The First Post

The First Post

Last week, I found myself returning to this question...

What would it be like to be in a world-class mastermind?

For those who don't know, a mastermind is a fancy term for a group of people, with someone leading the mastermind (usually as a teacher). This will often (but not always) involve in-person events. 

The reason I called this 'the first post', is because every time we write something, we are a different person compared to when we last wrote. 

Therefore, it’s always our 'first post', that we are writing in the moment. 

I was going to wait to share this until all 7 days of my hypothetical 'mastermind' were complete. 

So that I could bring this to you, not as someone in a better environment, foolishly mistaking their breakthrough as an identity that will carry them through in their home and work life...

But rather, as someone who laughed, felt, and cried in the process of engaging, and sharing openly, with others that are just like them. 

So I'll share with you an edited version of a quiet moment, that neatly summarizes my Day 1 experience.

The Fire Terrace

After sitting quietly at the dinner table, I slowly head outside to the fire terrace. 

I silently take in the beautiful view, remaining totally present. I enter a deeply meditative state as I get comfortable in a chair near the pool. 

The fire terrace is quieter than the dining room, where we just completed Day 1 of the Mastermind. 

Not silent...better than silent. 

I pause over the reflection. 

I didn't know there was such a thing. 

All my life, I had just wanted a quiet place - where I could hear myself think, and not have constant background noise. 

But this kind of quiet is different. 

it's a quiet that still has life in it. 

A low fire burns in the centre of the terrace, flames cutting the air in slow gold ribbons, as inner peace cuts the ribbons of thinking in the mind. 

The coastline fades in the darkness. Though I can no longer see the ocean, I hear it - this time, without needing to hold my ear to a sea shell. 

I sit, slowly. 

My body sinks into the cushions. 

Nothing needs to happen. 

No insight. 

No challenge. 

No next move. 

Just fire. 

Ocean. 

Air. 

The distant murmur of people, their words blending into a melodic energy. 

The soft, cool breeze across my face reminds me that, I am where I am supposed to be. 

The flames breathe the oxygen in sync with me. 

That's when it hits me. 

The evening replays before my eyes. 

But not as thoughts. 

As memories. 

Like the connection I felt when the waiter told me his name. Matteo. 

My appreciation for the challenges the first guests posed me, as I sat in the 'Don' chair at the table. 

Whether I want to lead, or prove. 

Whether I could receive. 

Mr. Vale talking about his late brother with pangs of regret. 

Robin saying, 'Love is not a debt'. 

I still feel that one. 

My own voice saying, 

'Thank you, Dad. I love you'. 

Because the therapy and training that allowed me to do extraordinary things...isn't a debt for me to repay. 

It's a gift to keep paying forward. 

What Do You Notice…

What is the room asking me to notice? 

That's the challenge Robin posed me at the end of the dinner...

And in the past, I would have searched for a solution. A way to close that loop. 

But no longer does the question feel overwhelming. 

It all enters the magic of the fire. 

Burning. 

Softening. 

Integrating. 

I don't need to hold on to the impact. 

I can let the impact pass through me. 

Just like I did when I recognized Matteo's wonderful service in front of the entire group. 

Or when I refused the dessert, recognizing myself as a 'sugaraholic' so that I could refuse the temptation of sugar, knowing how it would reactivate the pattern of craving sugar, as it had happened so many times before. 

Or when I galvanized the mastermind group - including the mentor, Robin - into cleaning up instead of the staff. 

Something I had resisted for so many years in my own household. 

A few people drift onto the terrace. 

They notice me, in deep contemplation. 

But the dinner has set the stage for the rest of the night. 

No one disturbs me. 

They feel the total presence. 

Not loneliness.

Not escapism. 

Presence. 

Robin steps onto the terrace a few minutes later, to mingle with the mastermind members. 

He sees me. 

He pauses. 

For a moment, it looks like he might come over. 

Then he smiles gently and occupies a chair several metres away. 

Proximity to be with me. 

Distance to not intrude on my silence uninvited. 

The Others

Dr. Nakamura sits near the fire, capturing its warmth in the chilly air. 

Mr. Okafor stands by the railing, gazing into the dark. 

Matteo, who I had given the 'Don' chair to earlier in the dinner, sees my state, and meticulously places a hot cup of tea on the small table beside me, not saying a word. 

Steam rises. 

Mint. 

I don't drink yet. 

I simply observe...feeling the smell, the raw energy of the beverage awakening my senses to a whole other level. 

Another act of care.

Another note in the melody. 

So ordinary, yet so magical. 

And in the deepest part of me, a stillness forms. 

Not loudly. 

Not performative. 

But a vow taking shape in my body. 

I do not need to chase transformation. 

I pause, noticing the old resistance is simply absent. 

I can become the kind of presence where transformation feels safe to arrive. 

The fire keeps burning. 

The ocean keeps breathing. 

Life continues. 

And the first night of this seven-day mastermind concludes not with glory or validation, not with a breakthrough, or a performance...

...but with me sitting in a chair under the night sky, feeling no need to be anywhere else. 

Nothing else exists. 

And somehow, that is enough.